Cousins’ full press conference transcript
West Australian
17th December 2008, 19:00 WST
How do you feel being at an AFL club again?It's fantastic. I'm very grateful to Terry Wallace and the Richmond Football Club for putting the faith in me and giving me the opportunity to resurrect my football career. The last 12 months have been long. It has been humbling but to be given the opportunity is fantastic.
Do you have to change or does Richmond have to adapt to having you at the club?It's very much up to me to fit into the playing group and meet the requirements just like every other player.
Where are you at with your drug issues?I think I've used the last 12 months the best I can. I'm really proud of the time and the effort that I've put into my rehabilitation and I feel more confident now than I ever have that I can contribute both on and off the field and lead a normal lifestyle whilst trying to get the best out of myself without the use of drugs.
Are you still carrying on with that rehab?Yes. That's the harsh reality of my affliction. It'd be nice to be able to dust myself off and leave it in the past but there's ongoing stuff that I am required to do.
What about the surveillance video that was spoken of in the Supreme Court yesterday. How do you respond to that?I'm not familiar with it. I haven't read the papers today. I guess it's like the six degrees of separation. Through the hard times that I've found myself in, people love to link me with other people who have found themselves in hard times. What doesn't get reported is that a lot of the relationships or associations that I have with those people have been borne out of sincere friendship - a common thread that we've sort of found ourselves in hard times. In a lot of those cases they have been people that have played pretty significant roles in me getting to where I am today.
Are you friends with Angelo Venditti?I know Angelo Venditti, yeah.
How well do you know him?I know him reasonably well, along with a number of people in the footy industry.
Does that cause you a problem or the club a problem if there's an association with someone who has been accused of being in the underworld?I'm not sure. My association or friendship or contact with him has been nothing to do with anything of a criminal nature. As far as I'm aware I don't think he's been convicted yet. It's not for me to go into. I was hopefully looking forward to today being about putting the past in the past and moving on. Hopefully it won't be long before things that get spoken about me are more related to football and less about stuff like that.
What are your footy goals for next year?I guess I'll have to sit down and assess that. Right the way through I've had a pretty healthy confidence in my ability. But I come to the footy club with no reputation as a footballer. I have to earn the respect from a training point of view. I'm like every other player. I have to earn the right to play in the seniors. Coming into the club at this stage of the pre-season, I'm behind the eight ball and have a hell of a lot of work to do to fight my way into the side.
When the AFL Commission made their decision on Monday, did you think it was all over?There's been definitely moments throughout the last six weeks where I've really questioned whether I was going to get there. The last 12 months, everything I've done has been about giving myself the opportunity to play. A lot of my concern or worry was about getting the clearance from the AFL Commission rather than finding a home at a football club. It turned out to be quite the opposite. The Commission gave us the green light and then it became a tough battle to convince football clubs to take me on. I understand that with me it's not just a football situation or a football decision. There's a lot that comes with it. Because of the enormity of my issue throughout the last 12 months, it's a lot for a footy club to take on. I'm grateful that the Richmond footy club have been able to do that.
When Terry Wallace rang you on Monday, did you have to convince him?Oh yeah. I made contact with Terry a couple of weeks ago. I'd dusted myself off after the national draft. I'd went from being what I thought in my own mind a real good prospect to probably having to deal with the harsh reality of maybe not getting picked up. That was probably the most testing time of the last 12 months. Then, the way I approached it was, I was going to leave no stone unturned in exploring all my football options. If anything came from it from then on, it was a bonus. Fortunately I got the opportunity to sit before Terry and the football people at this footy club and convince them to give us a shot.
Are you confident your body can hold up after a year out given your hamstring problems?I understand I'm 30 and have had 12 months off. But right the way through the time I've spent out of the game, I've put a lot of time and work into my body. I'm confident it's going to be able to hold up. But I guess the rigours of AFL football, you never really know until you get back into it.
Do you now have to leave some of the errors of our past behind?I would have thought. Part of the last 12 months has been about learning about the situations I can put myself in and some I can't. Throughout this whole process, I'm still very early on in my recovery and coming to terms with the changes in my lifestyle. Contrary to public opinion or what the press like to say, a lot of my associations that people think are untoward or have caused me to be in this situation couldn't be further from the truth. I am a drug addict. Part of my rehabilitation and the program I'm in is addicts helping other addicts. So it's not like I'm not going to have contact with people who have been in the situation that I have. It's probably quite the opposite. That's the contact that I require to keep myself on a level playing field.
If you hadn't have been picked up would you have played again?I think it probably would have been over. If clubs overlooked me, I'm 30 and another 12 months down the track wouldn't have made it any easier. I'm not sure how I would have responded in a football sense. I hadn't got too far ahead with that. I may have gone back and played half a dozen games in the WAFL just to get back to playing footy, which is what I love doing. I guess it was only a month ago that I started thinking about the prospect of never playing again. You're a long time retired and football has been a huge part of my life. It's played a huge positive role in my life. It's brought all the good things into my life and I'm just rapt to get back into it.
What assurances have you given Richmond?I sat down and spoke to them honestly about where I'm at, what I'm going through and the nature of my affliction. I'm confident I can fulfil my end of the bargain.
Are you happy with where you're at right now?Yeah.
How long have you been clean for?That's not something I want to go into now. But I can say that I'm clean and am positioned well for kicking off the next 12 months.
Are you worried about the effect that the documentary may have?No, I'm not worried about it.
Can you notice any difference in your fitness?No.
Will you not go out or have you spoken to the club about that?No I haven't spoken to them about that.
Have they put any restrictions on you?Not as yet, no.
How important is footy to your recovery?I think it's very important. I would like to think that had I not been given an opportunity I would have responded in the right way. It wouldn't have been an excuse to go back to my old ways. But this is what I've wanted. It's not necessarily the easy option. I have a lot to prove in a football sense. I guess putting rehabilitation or recovery back into the public forum is a risk or is a challenge. It's a big thing. It's not something that most people in my position go through. But I think it's the best chance for me to lead a normal lifestyle and a clean one.
Was there a point when you thought this was all too hard?Not really. I understand I'm the first person to go through this publicly in a football forum. It's a lot for people to comprehend or adjust. I don't hold any grudges against the clubs that have overlooked me, other than to hopefully to prove them wrong. They didn't owe me anything and I put myself in this situation.
Have you been surprised by the reaction to your drafting?I can't speak highly enough of the reception people have given us right throughout the year. I've been humbled, especially over the last 48 hours. The response from the footy public, and in particular the Richmond supporters, the average person on the street has been sensational. It would be very easy for people to make things hard for us, but I couldn't ask for a better leg up from people.
Have you thought about round one next year and playing against Juddy?I haven't had time. Round one is a while off and I've still got a hell of a lot of work to do. I still have to prove myself. I'm not a walk up start into this side. I've got to fight my way back into it just like everybody else has to.
What are your thoughts on Richmond fans thinking you'll make the difference to this team?I put a fair bit of expectation on myself. I like to consider myself a pretty hard trainer and they're the expectations I'm looking forward to having to live up to.
How big an influence has Kevin Sheedy had on you?I've been fortunate to have been able to seek him out for some advice. Obviously he's a hugely influential person in the football industry and has a lot of wisdom. He's certainly played a role.
Do you hope to be a role model?In the early part of my career I resented the fact that people expected me to be a role model. It probably didn't sit well with me because I was leading a bit of a double life. I think my ability now to be a role model, it sits better with me than it has before. I think my ability to relate to other kids who find themselves in hard times is probably better now than it has done before. Having said that, I don't propose to say that I'm out of the woods or I've dusted myself off and left it in the past. But I'm not the first person that's going to find themselves in hard times and I'm sure there's going to be a lot of people in the community that, growing up, find themselves in a similar situation.
Do you deserve a second chance? A lot of people say you don't.They're entitled to that opinion. People aren't privileged to all the information. I believe that I have earned the right to come back and play football. I think I got my fair whack. I'm not complaining. I'm not saying I'm hard done by. But I think now is probably a time where I can move on.
How do you keep yourself on the straight and narrow?It's a complex thing. There's a thousand things that I've learnt along the way. For whatever reason, I'm somebody that's had to learn a few of life's lessons the hard way. Life came along and gave me a slap. If it didn't happen 18 months ago or two years ago, it was going to happen at some point. Other than the fact that it's been really hard on the people around me, in some ways it's been the best thing because it's given me the opportunity to learn a bit about myself, learn why I am the way I am and I think I'm a better person for it.
Was it best for you to relocate to Melbourne?Yeah. I was really looking forward to making the move. West Coast have been a fantastic footy club. Perth has been great to me. I've been shot out of the sky. They say those that fly the lowest fly the longest so I understand that I've run my race there. I'm just looking forward to moving over here, starting with a new footy club, a new bunch of guys and starting fresh.
Can you get back to your best?I think I can get back to somewhere near my best. It remains to be seen. The game never stops changing and it's a cut throat industry. I'm up against it but I'm confident I can certainly make a healthy contribution.
Have you had any injuries in the last 12 months?No. I've had the luxury of removing myself from the rigours of the contact sport. I haven't stopped training so from the body point of view, I've never been in better shape.
How long have you got left?I'm not looking too far ahead. Two days ago I didn't have a footy club. I'm just focused on this year.
What's your mindset on dealing with the circus that this has become?Whether you like it or not, it's something I've had to deal with. I guess part of playing AFL football is you sign up for that. I feel more sorry for friends and family that don't necessarily deserve to have to deal with my issue on a public level. Dealing with addiction for families or friends is very hard privately, but to deal with it publicly has been very stressful and painful for my family and friends at times. I'm lucky that I do have a fantastic network of people around us that have gone a long way to me being here today.
Are you conscious of the potential for distraction?I'd like to think that after this week it goes back to just being about football. Obviously there's going to be slightly more hype about it at different stages during the year. I think it won't be long before it goes back to something of a reasonably normal nature.
Do you know your teammates?I've come into contact with them in football circles over the years. Essentially it's a fresh start. I know a few of the guys but I couldn't have asked for a better reception from the players. The support behind us has been very much appreciated. Football clubs are all the same. They're full of great people and I'm just rapt to get back involved.
What do you consider to be a success from here?I think just getting back to playing footy. Back leading a clean lifestyle. There's (sic) no guarantees in football. I could get injured just like anyone else. I don't necessarily judge going forward on how many kicks I get or how many games I play. I'll train exceptionally hard, leave no stone unturned and what happens after that is left up to the gods.
Are you prepared for the drug testing regime you'll have to follow?I'd want to be.
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