Hard road for Ben Cousins Mike Sheahan
Herald Sun
August 21, 2010 BEN Cousins signs off his coming documentary, Such is Life, with the message: "I've had to learn life's lessons the hard way."
The show, subtitled The Troubled times of Ben Cousins, is a harrowing story of how a young man with the world at his feet lost his way, almost destroying himself and his family in the process.
It will be shown on the Seven Network next Wednesday and Thursday nights.
The 2005 Brownlow Medal winner talks with remarkable candour about a long-running drug problem, describing his story as one of "drug addiction and chronic relapses".
During the introduction, he says: "I hope this documentary can send a powerful message to young people."
It will.
Members of his family and those close to him talk openly and emotionally about their frequent fears for his life.
One of his sisters, Melanie, said tearfully she didn't know at one point whether the family would lose Ben or their father, Bryan, a WAFL champion and former Geelong footballer, through stress.
The self-made documentary includes extensive footage and interviews dating back to early 2008.
Cousins openly admits to his addiction, describing it as a reflection of his obsessive personality and his search for inner peace.
"I'll always regret what I've put my family through," Cousins says.
"There's a lot of shame and regret. People wonder why I haven't broken down or shed a tear (in public). My tears are something that I hold close to me; they're for me and my family."
The documentary, seen by the Herald Sun, shows Cousins taking drugs several times. But the gun footballer says he never took performance-enhancing drugs.
Cousins, a fanatical trainer at the height of his brilliant career with West Coast, said he rewarded himself at the end of a hard week or month with a drug binge.
His attitude was summed up by a statement early in the first episode: "They expect you to live like a priest all week and fight like the devil all weekend.
"At the end of a block (of training) ... I was going to absolutely annihilate and launch into as much drugs as I could."
He admitted taking drugs as early as 17 or 18.
"It just opened a gateway for me and very quickly it became an obsession," he says. "Cocaine was my drug of choice."
His father said: "He thought he was bulletproof."
Cousins talks of benders lasting six days.
He recalls a time in Melbourne after West Coast's 2006 premiership win that ended with police intervention: "I don't think I'd had any sleep for six nights ... a lot of cocaine, a lot of ice."
When confronted by police, he gave his name to a policewoman. He was so tired and haggard, she didn't believe him.
He ripped his shirt open, bared his torso and said: "Well, I was (Ben Cousins) six days ago."
One of the many interesting elements of this compelling program was the impact of St Kilda's decision to abandon plans to draft him late in 2008 after his enforced year out of football.
"(Coach) Ross Lyon came to Perth and presented me with a St Kilda No. 9 guernsey (his number at West Coast).
"I'd really started to warm to the idea of becoming a Saint (joining his friend and former West Coast teammate Michael Gardiner)."
Long-time manager Ricky Nixon said Cousins could barely speak after being told St Kilda had decided against drafting him.
Cousins says in the documentary: "It was just life-sapping." He spent almost a week in bed, barely bothering to eat.
"I had grave fears for him," his father said.
Cousins, the last person to see former West Coast champion Chris Mainwaring before he died, described the death of his friend and mentor as "a tragic accident".
"I left him in a good state."
Such is Life is a must-see program in which Cousins, his family and those close to them speak with extraordinary openness and honesty.
It's a story of a young man's battle with drugs and the unconditional love of a family.
It is the story of a life-saving bond between a father and his son.
http://www.heraldsun.com.au/sport/afl/hard-road-for-ben-cousins/story-e6frf9jf-1225907998440
