Trent Cotchin Herald Sun column: Richmond captain interviews Shaun Hampson, Jack Riewoldt, Reece Conca, Jayden Short, Connor Menadue, Dylan Grimes and Shane EdwardsTRENT COTCHIN,
Herald Sun
29 July 2017RICHMOND captain Trent Cotchin goes inside the Tigers’ den and puts seven of his teammates under the griller.
Richmond’s Shaun Hampson, Jack Riewoldt, Reece Conca, Jayden Short, Connor Menadue, Dylan Grimes and Shane Edwards completed their own ‘player profile’ for the skipper.
The stars were quizzed on which teammate was most likely to Google themselves, to which Tiger gave them the worst first impression, to who has the worst habit at Punt Road.
And there were some eyebrow-raising answers!
TRENT COTCHIN: If you could have any superpower, what would it be?Hampson: Time travel. The possibilities are endless.
Riewoldt: Read minds.
Conca: Teleportation. So I can sneak anywhere I like.
Short: Invisible, I would follow Kamdyn McIntosh around for a week every day after training and actually see what he does.
Grimes: I’d love to be able to fly — it’s always been a dream of mine.
Edwards: Speed. But I’d only use it subtly enough to win Gold at the Olympics.
What would your superhero name be?Hampson: Probably just Shaun but I could time travel!
Riewoldt: Super Normal
Conca: Telesneak
Short: Jaydo
Grimes: Optimus-Grimes or Grim Reaper
Edwards: Ushane Bolt
If you weren’t playing footy, you’d be ...Hampson: In physically better condition with all my ligaments intact.
Riewoldt: A carpenter.
Conca: Youth worker.
Short: A helicopter pilot or I’d be Shacky’s assistant physio.
Menadue: Sleeping in.
Grimes: Working on the family farm for sure.
Edwards: I’d be a firefighter.
Best and worst in a survival situation?Hampson: Best: Grimesy because he’s ice cold and void of all emotion when it comes to killing. Worst: Rancey. Would not make it through the first day. Would go too hard.
Conca: Best: Dave Astbury because I once saw him tackle a sheep. Worst: Ivan Maric because he’s precious.
Short: Best: Dan Butler grew up in Ballarat — it takes a lot to survive up there. Worst: Jack Graham, a posh kid from Adelaide.
Menadue: Best: Shane, can use his special ability of taking a couple of sidesteps and disappear. Worst: Rance — everyone would think he would be best so gets ahead of himself and makes a silly move.
Grimes: Best: Shane Edwards, very crafty like MacGyver, which could be useful. Worst: Rancey, makes erratic decisions and would wind up hurting himself early on and becoming a liability.
Edwards: Best: Daniel Rioli can fish, hunt, he’s fast, doesn’t eat much. Worst: Dustin Martin, because he would eat all the rations in the first 15 minutes.
Player you’d most like to marry your daughter?Hampson: Shane Edwards. Complete dreamboat.
Conca: Shane Edwards, because he’s the complete package.
Short: Ryan Garthwaite is a very respectful man. I’d have to ask him out for her, though. He’d buckle under the pressure.
Menadue: Shane (Edwards). Total package, funny, good looking, smart and loyal.
Grimes: Corey Ellis, the inoffensive choir boy who knows how to be a gentleman.
Edwards: Ivan Soldo. To add some height into our gene pool.
Most likely to board pets post footy?Riewoldt: Kamdyn McIntosh (crazy cat lady).
Short: Dylan Grimes wants to turn the winery into an animal shelter. He’s already adopted three cats and he won’t stop talking about how many more animals he is going to save.
Grimes: Oleg Markov. I’m pretty sure he already owns a guinea pig, which is a step in the wrong direction.
Edwards: Ben Griffiths. He has two dogs already and a big juicy heart with lots of love to give.
Most likely to Google themselves?Hampson: Alex Rance. I’ve caught him on a number of occasions.
Short: Brandon Ellis got caught searching himself on his laptop and also caught with a selfie of himself as the background.
Grimes: Jack Riewoldt, only to see the Google suggestion: “Did you mean Nick Riewoldt?”
Edwards: Connor Menadue. Didn’t change his Facebook profile pic from his Vic Metro mugshot for years.
What would you try if you knew you couldn’t fail?Short: Jet pack around the world.
Menadue: Be an NBA player.
Grimes: Sing, write a book, cure cancer. List could go for days.
Edwards: Write/direct/act in a movie that wins best picture.
Who gave you the worst first impressions at the club, and how is your relationship now?Hampson: Steve Morris. The intensity of him. Relationship is great, but intense.
Riewoldt: Leppa, but we’re excellent now.
Conca: Jack Riewoldt because he was so loud and out there. But now we’re besties and he’s incredible on and off the field.
Shane Edwards learned a lesson after driving Dustin Martin home. Picture: AAP
Grimes: From memory, Andrew Browne texted me on my draft night congratulating me, and pretending to be Chris Newman. He convinced me he would help me to learn the ropes around the club, but that he hated body contact and not to touch him at all under any circumstances. It made for an awkward moment when I went to tackle Newy in one of my first training sessions.
Edwards: Dustin Martin. Gave him a lift home from training and numerous times he wouldn’t give me the directions until I missed the turn. Our relationship now is better, but when my food comes out he always says: “If you don’t eat all that I’ll have it.”
Who has the worst habit at the club?Hampson: Menadue — all kinds of filthy habits. I tell him to stop.
Riewoldt: Ben Griffiths — poor joke-telling ability.
Short: Brandon Ellis won’t let anyone else start this ground ball drill we do. He has to be the first to get a ground ball every time. I still try to go first and he stresses out.
Menadue: Coach always tries to wrestle me. I do nothing, just cop it. One day though …
Grimes: Conca’s whistling is enough to drive you mad. The Bang and Olufsens come in handy on interstate trips.
Edwards: Ben Griffiths. He puts used towels or random dirty objects at the bottom of peoples’ bags so they take them home at the end of the day.
What you have seen or heard that you probably shouldn’t have?Edwards: I overheard Daniel Rioli referring to Dimma (Damien Hardwick) as “Dad”.
What annoying little thing would you make illegal?Hampson: People not waving as you make way for them to pass you in the car.
Riewoldt: People who sit in the right lane and don’t overtake.
Conca: Chewing with your mouth open.
Grimes: I planted a camera in the changerooms to find out who was tying my jumper in a knot before every training session. Who would have thought Bachar Houli would have been the culprit?
Edwards: Man buns should be illegal. Stupid sexy haircut.
What’s your “I know it’s weird but just try it” thing?Hampson: Yantra mat. A mat full of spikes that you lie on and it puts you to sleep in no time.
Riewoldt: Peanut butter and jam.
Conca: Vegemite and strawberry jam together, on toast.
Short: Raw sausages with mustard and lemon juice. Weird but, boy, it’s good.
Menadue: Drowning your food in gravy.
Grimes: Dim sims chopped in half on the BBQ. Bit of soy — unreal.
Edwards: Plain white rice with just salt and pepper. Surprisingly not that bad.
How would you have gone playing in the ’80s when footy was tough?Hampson: I’d pretend.
Riewoldt: Cakewalk.
Conca: I’d be all right, I guess.
Short: Very good. A lot more kicking back then, very little handball, exactly what I like.
Menadue: I would have been a pretty good water boy.
Grimes: Those blokes were tough. I am a terrible drinker so would have copped some grief when they were smashing beer at halftime.
Edwards: More pack marks in the ’80s means more crumbs, so maybe I’d go all right. That’s if I made it past the UFC fight before the opening bounce.
What would you do if a genie gave you three wishes?Hampson: Time travel; put an end to hunger and poverty; and wish for a turkey sandwich.
Riewoldt: Always have correct change in my pocket; time travel; and have the ability to make anyone smile at any time.
Conca: Wish there was never sickness for anyone in the whole world; smaller nose; and, make Melbourne warmer.
Short: Wish to grow over 183cm and have (housemate) Kane Lambert wash his dishes; and have a city with no traffic.
Menadue: Teleport; have a mansion to live in with my mates; and never run out of money.
Grimes: Wish that world hunger was never a problem; never get tired or need to sleep; and remember every time that I was completely happy.
Edwards: Place the suburb of Golden Grove into the heart of Santa Monica, LA; belly laugh three times a day; and look like Shaun Hampson.
Why were you given your name?Hampson: I was named after my parents’ dog. I don’t think it has helped or hindered as it’s an everyday run of the mill name.
Riewoldt: Unsure but wish my name was Jimmy Recard.
Conca: Mum said I was born with beach blonde hair and looked like a Reece. I’m very happy with it. Stoked it’s not spelt the other way — “Rhys”.
Short: Parents’ friends suggested the name Jayden and they went with it. I didn’t have a name for four weeks so they helped me heaps because it’s a pretty good name.
Menadue: It was out of Joel and Connor. My older brother said I’m a Connor, so that’s what I am.
Grimes: There was a famous poet named Dylan Thomas (my middle name). His stuff is pretty incredible but apparently he was an alcoholic, so it isn’t really ideal to be named after him.
Edwards: I was named Shane because Mum and Dad just liked the sound of it. If I could have any name it would probably be Shaun, though, to help out all the media personalities who actually call me that.
What will your body look like 10 years after retirement?Hampson: Hopefully in one piece.
Riewoldt: Pasty and white.
Conca: Hopefully all right. Skinny legs will always be the same. Might add a few kgs around the belly.
Short: Will be very skinny, probably high skin folds especially around the stomach area.
Menadue: Probably the same.
Grimes: I’m planning on never stepping foot into a gym again after footy, and with my body type, I am likely to lose weight dramatically post footy. In 15 years, I will pretty much look exactly like Connor Menadue does now.
Edwards: Ten years after retirement? I should be finishing puberty around then. Judging by how late I started I should be in good shape.
Thanks for your time. Last one ... one word that best describes me?Hampson: Family man.
Riewoldt: Family man.
Conca: Odd.
Short: Erratic outbursts of uncontrolled energy.
Menadue: Energetic.
Grimes: Perfect in his imperfections.
Edwards: Friendly.
http://www.heraldsun.com.au/sport/afl/teams/richmond/trent-cotchin-interviews-seven-richmond-teammates-in-bid-to-find-what-makes-them-tick/news-story/bb0854dbc9bd9a330ba3c74bd63f7a0f
